So, I’ve succumbed to buying a new mouse, in a frenzy of retail therapy. Nothing beats spending hours on the internet reading reviews and amazon prices on electronic products which, if you really want to own them physically, involves going to the oblique electronics megastore a few train stops away IN PERSON to buy, though of course not to test as they’re premium products that just get nicked if they let people try them first. So there’s a really important side of the purchase to research the thing before you skate down to the train station and board a train to Aldrington. Wonderful little place whence you get there, one hundred metre downhill skate about a yard wide past pedestrians, don’t worry, they’ll jump. Coming around the corner to the industrial park though, some wanker decided to honk his horn on me, and I knew he was willing to debate. His Jaguar and stubbly hair style spelt it out. So I confronted him on the way into the megastore, pumped with excitement about my pending purchase, with a volley of conviction about how important it is to youse your brain. It does not give you the right to run someone over just because he’s not wearing a licence plate while propagating on the street. He got it, I think.
On I walked past the laptops, none of which have superseded my MacBook Pro ’13, neither in looks nor performance, except now you can touch the screen, not that it’s ever jumped out at me before. There’s a special section for the premium Mouses, or mice??, and the long haired dude said that the RAT 5 is the one people come here for. I liked the look of the RAT 1, neon yellow with black, just like the RAT PRO S, but I’m a sucker for simplicity, and sophistication of course which is why I bought both, the RAT 5 and the RAT 1 after the gentleman explained how you can buy them and return them both if you don’t like them, just be a bit careful unwrapping them and if that goes wrong tell ’em you’ve bought the demo ones and every Curry’s/PCWorld will refund you. [apparently]. This is better than amazon. So I walked back to the counter, realising there’s more fun to be had on the outer reaches of Brighton, REMEMBER, we’re in Aldrington, past Portsladia and Fisherswick where the train broke down last time, just before Hove, actually.
I couldn’t focus on the conversation about OLED screens versus normal ones while my gaze was fixated on the £299 offer on a hairdryer by Dysons, that sexy household bugger, always good for a blow. I mean, that’s beyond really. So we continued to chat about that and finally he pulled it out. The hairdryer, it was AMAZING. So much like a real hairdryer, just without that burning smell. Robbed me of a sensation and my world went into tailspin. Hairdryers that don’t smell burnt, clinically serene, making you think they’re there to blow hot air on your hair. With a big inviting hole through it, you wouldn’t know what thats for. (Don’t get not the wrong side of it , it’s hot.)> And the angular design. Purple at the back, nice touch, you’ve got to hold a digital looking button up to keep it going, it’s like a laptop or a hard disk or something like that, just not like a hairdryers big trigger. Wow. I
refrained from purchasing it and wandered over to the TVs. OLED is fine, not a crap as the made it sound like, just expensive, and NOT CURVED. I was deliberating when suddenly the coordinated imagery turned to BURMA. Seriously, the temples of Bagan appeared in the morning light on all screens around me, like I need a reminder of where I was or should be going. My heart is there, the visuals tell me, it’s Myanmar I want to be.
And that’s the first part of the RAT 5 / 1 review